“Death Ain’t Nothing”

There is no time limit on how long you should be angry or sad; No time limit on emotions…period. I will say with any negative emotion you literally have to fight through it to keep your sanity. This week someone pretty close to me died, he was the one that introduced me to Christ. I skimmed Facebook knowing all my acquaintances would be updating everyone on how sad they were or how they hope that he rests in peace. I don’t believe it is a place to share something like death especially before the family members has the chance. I am aware that everyone grieves differently, but what comfort can you get from reaching through Facebook?

To each his own, I suppose.

And while we are on death, let’s talk about the “wake”. In the South we refer to it as a “setting up/sitting up (just depends on how country you are ha-ha)” and that is just what you do—sit up with the family. I am one of those people that are easily drained when I’m around people for prolonged periods, so please just go home. Please. I understand it is a tradition and you want to help but visiting hours will be posted, so follow my wishes please. I will need time away from everyone else, so please don’t take it personally. I looked around at certain family members and I noticed that some of them need people to come and “sit up” with them to get their mind off of the negative emotions, to get their mind off of death. Please don’t share with me any clichés about death either. Just be quiet with me. If you must come over, let’s just sit.

“It’ll be alright” “God picked the best” “God won’t put more on us than we can bear”
Sure it’s easy to say death ain’t nothing, and believers are with Christ, resting in peace, but it still hurts.
No one really knows how you feel when a loved one dies, which is why no one ever knows what to say. Because the “common denominator” is the simple fact that we are humans –we have an idea of the pain you’re experiencing. This is why I cry when you cry, I feel your pain. When words can’t help you it’s a peace, a joy in knowing that God sent a comforter for us all. The comforter feels what we feel, and understands our every cry. When babies cry the mother predicts what the child wants or needs, but God simply knows. He knows. And sometimes only God can give comfort and mere humans just won’t cut it. But, thank you for the effort, I’ll remember the effort…

Here is some comedic relief from one of my favorite plays: Fence by August Wilson 🙂


4 responses to this post.

  1. My prayers go out to you and that family during this difficult season. “Because the common denominator is the simple fact that we are humans –we have an idea of the pain you’re experiencing.”


  2. Coicidentaly, you wrote this on the day my step-dad died. Death is a very personal thing. I do agree that much of how we treat death has to do with a lot of emotional energy that we don’t know what to do with. Now days we have too many ways to communicate and perhaps don’t give much thought to where we say and what we say.
    Because my mom has dementia, the funeral service and having her sisters around was very important and helped her to accept that her dear friend is now gone.

    My condolences to you on your loss.


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